"Meeting at Transgender Friendly Night Clubs"

  the "face-to-face" stuff

In general, the very best looking t-girls in the US are rarely found actively "on line". Granted, you'll find many images of them taken with a camera on the Web - but most are found real time each weekend - in the nation's "t-friendly" bars. Why? First, most of the prettiest t-girls can "go out" just about any place - as a girl - and have a great time. And believe me - it's much more fun going out dancing, visiting with friends, and having "real time" fun - than it is hanging around indoors screwing with your computer.  

Second, maintaining a computer, ISP's, and any personal web site - takes money. As most of the loveliest t-girls live as women on a "full time" basis - many are forced to contend with a common decline in their socioeconomic status. Loose change and free time become more rare commodities.

If you'd like to meet some of these lovely ladies - and you live in a large city - you're in luck. Bars that are "havens" for t-girls aren't difficult to find in major metropolitan areas. Local "gay trade" magazines that include scheduled DRAG performances at area bars will quickly get you on the track to finding a club to your tastes. Lots of similar information is available on-line. I think the best in my area is GayGuides.Com.

If you don't live in a larger city - you might still find a bar with t-girls in your area. I never ceased to be amazed at some of the fun places I discover during my travels. Alas, there are always those low air fares to the major metropolitan markets.

bar wars

Ever been to a t-friendly bar? If your initial experience was like many, it wasn't very easy to talk to "the girls". Why? First, you were probably a bit nervous - you were out of your element - as well as your "environment". Also, you might still grappling with your sense of sexuality - asking yourself: "What in the h*** am I doing here?" Sound familiar? *Grin*

On the other hand - "she" seems aloof. She's definitely in her environment. She probably knows the people at the bar - and some of the other girls around her. She is confident with her surroundings.

Finally, you get up the nerve to say "hi" - and she blows you off. What went wrong?

basic preparations

To be effective at "tranny chasing", there are a few things you'll need to do - in order to enhance your possibility for success.

good grooming

It is a rare t-girl indeed who is attracted to someone who doesn't observe good grooming habits. You don't have to be a fashion bug, or a model - but cleanliness is next to Godliness. Remember - you are dealing with someone who must go to extraordinary lengths - just to look decent as a woman. It is only natural for her to appreciate a "well kept" appearance.

get a grasp on what you are after

She likely has neither the time nor inclination to help you decide if "this" is right for you. She has many options in terms of play partners. Trying to convince a newcomer he should spend time with her, is just not on her agenda. As much as some newcomers think their "t-girl virginity" will be appealing - it isn't. I'd keep that fact to myself, if I were you.

get past the jitters

If you get nervous when you first get near a "real, live" t-girl - you've got some work to do. This nervousness is a function of unfamiliarity. It's similar to when you were 16, and started dating genetic girls. (Okay, "9" - for you whoremongers. LOL) Unfamiliarity breeds lack of confidence. And lack of confidence often results in failure - when you are "hitting" on anyone.

If this is your case, I'd suggest you seriously consider making your first, big t-girl adventure with a "professional" girl. You'll get a clearer picture of what you really "prefer" - and you'll get past the jitters of what it's actually like. I'm very aware that it is this "anatomical difference" regarding what's in our panties that is attracting you to us. The girl you meet will be aware of it as well. However, it is this exact difference that you so much need to get past in your mind - while "talking". If you'll treat us like any regular gal - and leave the "20 questions" at home - you'll do much better.

The girl you are "scoping" in the club will very likely not be jitterish. She will also seem confident in her surroundings. Does this familiarity mean she's a "lounge lizard"? Of course not. She doesn't have many choices on where she can safely go out en femme. Safety is crucial to most us girls. The last place we ever want to end up is "behind bars" - in a dress. 

Many girls can easily pass as women and have loads of fun in somewhat "hip" traditional clubs. However, there is always the risk of running into "Joe Redneck" or some guy who doesn't know the meaning of the word "no".  If you think a guy can get his ego bruised getting blown off by a genetic female - you should see how some will react when one of us do it. 

T-friendly bars tend to look after the "girls". Going to the same place over a period time, makes it easy for us to get to know the people working and hanging out there. 

first words

What do you first say to the "t-girl of your dreams"? That depends on a million things, but there are a few mannerisms I'd pass on. First, please don't do the "hard core" staring thing. We get "stared at" a lot over time - and it is rarely taken as a "positive" implication. Look enough to let her know you are interested - but leave the zombie routine at home.

The best thing to do is just "smile" - and wave - once you've caught her eye. Trust me on this. It works! If she smiles back, give yourself a moment, and head over and order a drink next to where she is sitting. Compliment something about her ensemble - but stay clear of the "you're so beautiful" comment. Guys who start with this statement, have that overwhelmed look in their eye - and can put a girl's guard up in a hurry. 

As girls, our outlook on personal "safety" increases exponentially. We can't run fast in heels and we are often in a "bad position" to press charges against those who might have physically harmed us. Therefore, our best option is usually to just sit there looking pretty and remaining safe and sound in an environment we know  - if we feel even the slightest tinge "you could be a nutcase". ::)). 

I think you'll find that overall, the t-girls you'll meet will be highly enjoyable to chat with and get to know. Most are very intelligent people and tend to possess a keen wit. Think about it - the playfulness and comradery of a guy - in a woman's body. Tough to beat, huh?

reality check

Okay. You are now sitting next to her, and haven't yet been chased off. What next? Prior to going out in public and "on-line" as Renee, I viewed women's comments on how "crude and rude" men could be as simply classic gender bashing. Having spent so much time out "en femme", I can confirm this little complaint as factual: A lot of men act like jerks!

The worst type is the guy who honestly believes he's doing me some sort of "favor" by giving me attention. Some men are under the mistaken assumption they are one of very few that would have an interest in an attractive TV/TS. Let me set the record straight in this department.

T-girls typically hang out in t-friendly bars. Outside of the gays, most every single guy in the club is at least somewhat interested in meeting an attractive t-girl. I've seen many GG's (genetic girl) get a real complex in such clubs. I get offers every night from men, women, couples - and I get a lot of them. If you are going to get her interest, you must first get her attention.

If you have a bad attitude, I'd suggest you drop this whole issue - and find a woman stupid enough to endure your approach.

If however, you're a relatively nice guy - read on…

the right attitude

Regardless if you are meeting a girl "on line", or in a bar - these "rules" will get you a lot closer to your goal:

Be nice! Notice the exclamation point after the word nice - if you'll just keep repeating that word in your head, you'll do quite well. Does that sound difficult? You'll get a lot further if you remember this simple courtesy.

Be Honest. If you are married, tell her as soon as it's appropriate. She may be married herself, as many T-girls are. Leave the "I'm a multi-millionaire" routine at home - remember these girls were once "guys". ::)) They've already heard all these lines as women. Some even used them as men. Besides, for all you know - the hot blonde sitting next to you - is actually Bill Gates! ::))

Be Direct. If you are genuinely interested in going out with her, you can quickly ascertain if she "dates guys" - many t-girls do not - but that doesn't mean some don't like to flirt a little!! However, most are very up front in being honest in their response to this question.

Be Generous within Reason. If you meet her in a bar, offer to buy her a drink. Do you have any concept what it costs to just basically transform from "male to female"? For starters, her basic makeup up inventory costs over $300.00 - and a "girl" like me has to use twice as much of the stuff as a genetic woman, to look good. She has to maintain two wardrobes ($1,500++), her hair often costs more than a four-star meal, and her dry cleaning bill could support a small country. I make more money than most people I meet. However, I sure appreciate that simple gesture for "openers".

Be Patient. How many times have you walked up to a girl in a bar and said "Let's go f*** - only to have her grab her keys and lead you out the door? The chances of this happening with a genetic female are rare - and even more unlikely with a T-girl.

Why? First, when a t-girl is "out" in a dress - she is in a fairly vulnerable position. How would you like to have some trouble, and end up at the police station in "silk and linen"? No thank you! Most girls are quite cautious - and rightfully so. There are too many psycho's out there. A lot of guys are hesitant to give a t-girl a phone number, or any form of mutual contact. However, they want them to go off with them to some private place, and be intimate. The girl has no recourse if you get out of line. Keep this "give and take" in mind.

Second, she may still be considering her "sense of sexuality" and potential attraction to you as a masculine male. As I've discussed before, many girls have no such interest, others do. Many more are sitting on the fence on the matter. (See, I told 'ya we're just like women! *grin*) If this the case, you know the drill from here: turn on the charm, stiffen the drinks, and roll the dice. LOL

Try Being a Gentleman. A real transgendered person, fully "takes on" the feminine gender when dressed. This often includes inherently female traits - like the need to form an emotional bond with someone - before being sexually attracted to them. Just as a t-girl tends to "over dress" - in a highly feminine manner to most clearly manifest this "other side" - this same "intensity" can carry over into the sexual side as well.

Simply stated: this girl is often more of a lady, than many genetic women you'll meet. For some strange reason, a lot of newcomers to the world of TG Admirers, start with the mistaken impression these girls are just "sluts". They fail to understand that transgenderism is not about sex - but rather - sexuality expression. 

If you're looking for this "type of girl", you will need to find some neophyte crossdresser - who simply gets turned on wearing women's pantyhose. However, I doubt you're going to find them very attractive, in comparison to a more experienced t-girl.

bar manners

You've been chatting awhile. You like her. She seems fun - and interested in you. What next? Take it easy!. A lot of guys get a little excited during their first "round" with an attractive t-girl. One thing most are dying to do - is put their hands on her legs - and move them up to that "slightly different" panty bulge. My suggestion? Keep your hands off - until it's clear she wouldn't mind them being there.

I have nice, long, and smooth legs. For this reason, many guys who sit next to me at a bar get obsessed with touching them. All fine and dandy, but unless I touched yours there's first - I don't exactly like it. I know they get all hot and bothered with the "t-girl paradox" - but it can really get irritating. Your hand on my thigh might be a big thrill for you, but unless I'm attracted to you, it doesn't do a thing for me.

I've been groped, probed, and pawed more times than I care to remember. I get felt up, at least 20 times in a very crowded bar by both men and women - any Saturday night I go out. I'm used to it. You can get your cheap thrills, but you'll never get past first base with such an approach. It doesn't phase me any more - but it also doesn't turn me on.

I'm considered fairly friendly in "the club" environment. In general, I like people. As I've been doing the female / nightclub "thing" for a very long time - you have to really get out of line - to piss me off. Most gals, however, have a much shorter "fuse". 

Get too forward, and you will likely find yourself outside the confines of the bar in a hurry. Most clubs, that are accepting of t-girls, also look out for them to a degree. The "girls" are really part of the show - the atmosphere. At every club I go to, they do a great job of not letting anyone cause a girl trouble. I've had more than one person canned, because they didn't seem to understand "no" - really does means "no".

I personally don't go to bars to meet men or women. I go to have fun and socialize with friends. "My fun" does not include leaving with strangers. It never did as a guy - and it certainly doesn't as a woman.

The bottom line: newcomers will very rarely leave with an attractive t-girl their first time out, unless they are paying for the pleasure. You are going to have to invest some time.

tg bar personalities

I've already discussed the basic personalities of the core tg's. However, they sometimes change a bit in a social setting. Here I'm going to talk about the most common girl "personalities" you'll see when out clubbing.

The Pro's

You will probably have little trouble finding the working girls as many are there looking for you! They are typically the most feminine in appearance (i.e. breast enhancements, etc.) Unlike the girls who aren't on the clock, she won't likely blow you off if you are initially shy and uncertain. However, she will quickly try to establish if you are simply trying to find a no-cost date, or are willing and able to "invest" in your pleasure. 

The DRAG Queens

Drag Queens, by more classic definition - is a gay guy "dressed as a girl". When it comes to sexual fun, most are only going to be interested in meeting you "out of fem". Translation - they will NOT want to wear a dress, wig, or make up in the bedroom. If it doesn't bother you to have sex "with a guy" - have at it! 

The Hetero Girls

Need I say more, you probably don't stand a chance here hon. Some of these girls are into other certain t-girls, so unless you look great in a dress, move on...

The TG Social Queen

For many girls, being out at a tg friendly bar is her only means of being able to get out of the house en fem, and have a little fun. Thus, a lot of girls are there just to enjoy the sensation of being out in the world - as a girl - and are not overly concerned with pursuing any sexual adventure.

If they are "regulars", they'll be dancing, laughing with everyone, and generally having fun. Although they might seem flirtatious, most have no intention of leaving with a stranger. You'll have to get to know them much better before you'll get to first base with these gals.

The TG Church Girl

Actually, many t-girls you'll see in bars fit this category, They hang out with the other girls, and are very concerned about what others "think". They don't dance - because - God forbid - they'd screw up their perfect make-up job and hairdo. They often love your attentions, but unless you get them away from their friends, you're pretty much toast. Is this sounding like "regular" women, or what?

The New Girl

New girls are easy to spot. They usually got there early, and have a great seat. (which always pisses me off! LOL) They don't chat much, and seem shy. They are often as nervous to be there - as you would be to talk with them.

With a degree of manners, the new girl will likely be receptive to your advances. It just varies if she is attracted to men.

The Home Run

If you are not seeking "a pro" - this is your dream date - if you can snare her. She'll likely know a lot of people, be fairly friendly to all, and is as likely to leave alone as with someone. She may look stunningly perfect or frazzled from dancing, depending upon her mood. She will usually dress fairly provocatively - as it is her nature.

She will also be one of the more sought after targets in a crowded club. 

Happy Hunting! ::))

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