Secrets to a More Successful Gender Transition
Want to be more successful with transition? Here you’ll find hodgepodge of essential tips.
Your first major goal: stealth
A lot of gals - like me, were too wrapped up in how to become prettier. However, until you achieve stealth - in your style & presentation, your life’s going to remain kind of ugly no matter how pretty you look. Thus, no matter how many procedures or steps you undertake to become prettier - you'll still feel ugly. By achieving stealth you’ll be able to quit being a trans-woman - and evolve to a woman...that also happens to be transgender.
Of course, certain FFS & body augmentation improves our feminine presentation - which enhances stealth. Breast augmentation is a classic example. However: know this. The prettier you become...the more closely you'll be examined: people admire beauty. A gal whose drop-dead gorgeous faces far more scrutiny than a chick like me.
How do we more quickly achieve stealth?
It takes four steps - in congruence:
- Confidence. Not thinking about everything you must do to be female - just being her.
- Appropriate fashion - age appropriate, event appropriate, season appropriate…in no other way do we stand out more quickly as trans than not learning the rules of appropriate fashion and personal styling.
- Lots of voice practice - fear over using our voice is the most debilitating aspect for most new trans girls. Certainly was for me! It was actually quite amazing how long I could carry a conversation like a mime - with just facial and hand gestures. The worst byproduct of this approach? I missed out on engaging lots of potential new friends. Make voice practice a big early priority.
- Finish electrolysis. Electrolysis is so very painful, takes such a long time, creates ugly swelling, is expensive, and it’s the slowest moving aspect of transition. However, it completely resolves those tell-tale facial shades and allows us to go out with little or no make up. I put it off - tried to sidestep it with laser. Temporary fixes are just that. Get ‘er done, GF!
- Out of all of these?
Confidence is the most powerful - which is a function of experience - which is also a function of time. Thus, get off your computer, get out of the house…and start interacting with more people soon! ((hugs))
Other Important Tips for a Successful Gender Transition
Be Patient with Old Friends - Work hard to maintain your previous lifelong connections. Give them a break and don’t take it so personal when they slip and call you “he”. You need the deep roots that only occur from lifelong associations to survive the disassociation of a new gender.
Keep Your Day Job - Perhaps the biggest mistake we tend to make is trying to create a whole new career just as we start our new gender. More gals failed with transition because of financial devastation than any other reason.
Make Close Female Friends - There’s an old adage: “Men need women…and women need women”. You can’t survive being a woman without close female friends. I’m not talking about your trans-sisters: I’m talking born-women. They’re the ultimate source for refining your new self. Listen to their fashion and hair advice. Watch how they interact. Learn to duplicate their natural warmth. When in Rome? Do as the Romans do!
Move beyond Tranny “News” - It’s hard enough for old friends & family to deal with our new existence. If all we ever talk about is transgender issues & stories? It’s overwhelming. Have you ever been around someone who just bought a new beach house or started a new relationship….and that’s all they talk about? Gets old, doesn’t it? Guess what? Our inner circle gets just as sick of hearing about crap like how the American Indians once embraced transgenders as “two spirits” - and every other anecdotal insight we love to chatter. Do yourself a favor - don’t define your life by being transgender.
Chapters in This Section include:
MTF Gender Transition Introduction
Secrets to a More Successful MTF Transition
Non-verbal Female Communication Skills
Five Keys to MTF Transition Success
Ten Most Common MTF Transition Traps
Finding an MTF Transition Mentor
Choosing Your New Name as a TS Woman
Total Stealth for MTF Transsexual
Surviving an MTF Transition
Five Mistakes Transsexual Most Often Make with Transition
Success with a Partial Transition
Transgender Depression and Suicide
Shortcuts to a Successful MTF Transition
Final Steps to MTF Gender Transition